How to suck the joy out of life

Today I went through a bit of a Paradigm Shift. It was with regards to my appendix.

Like the majority of people in the world, I assumed it was useless, a vestigial bit left over from when we were less evolved into what we are now. But I was wrong. In fact, it would be hard to be any ‘wronger’.

I’m presently reading 10% Human by Alanna Collen and she explains how it was Charles Darwin who, in his second great book, The Descent of Man theorised that the appendix, having no discernible function in humans must be left over from the long distant past.

As Ms Collen explains, in terms of evolution, this is not possible. Anything in an evolutionary system that is unnecessary will, over time, vanish. It will not win the arms race (as coined by Richard Dawkins) that everything takes part in. It takes up valuable real estate and, therefore, would be replaced by something useful.

Ms Collen states that the appendix is actually a sort of arsenal, a storehouse full of microbes. They sit there, happily existing, through generations of life and death, until they are needed to fight any big infection that begins within us.

I was reading this while sitting on a park bench having completed my first masked shop. A mask I was ordered to wear to protect other people from my microbes. Both good and bad.

I’m pretty sure I’ve written many times about how I love the social aspect of shopping. How I love interacting with people. In fact, according to Mirinda, this socialising is necessary, otherwise I’d be alone most of the time given I don’t work.

This morning’s experience was very depressing. When you can’t see another person’s face, you can’t communicate properly. You are alone, secluded, removed from society.

I wonder, more than ever, why Muslim women put up with living behind this awful wall. Why on earth do Muslims think it’s what their so-called god prefers? Surely it was their god that created faces in the first place.

But, I digress.

What I found, by wandering the aisles of Waitrose hiding behind my bandanna, was that I couldn’t talk or socialise with anyone. I didn’t want to and it was hard to make sense of the muffled sounds people were making. People seemed unapproachable. No-one seemed to be smiling at all. Beyond polite noises, I was silent.

As I said to Mirinda when she asked for my report “It has sucked the joy out of shopping.

Which makes it sound like I enjoy shopping. I think, rather, that it shows I don’t like shopping as much as I like socialising.

Wear a mask, everyone says. Be more isolated so the lonely can stay that way, more like. Hide behind a bit of cloth so people will stop talking and being a community.

It’s even more anti-social than earbuds, earplugs and headphones.

And while I’m on the subject of anti-social behaviour…I see the burned out bin has acquired even more rubbish. Perhaps, soon, the mound of rubbish will hide the remains of the bin, a fitting tribute to human stupidity.

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