The House Husband

Today I overheard someone talking on a phone, obviously giving directions:

“If you keep walking, you’ll find me,” she said and then paused to listen.
“Near gate 22,” she said and then paused to listen.
“No! Just keep walking! You’ll reach me eventually,” she said and then listened.
“Of course you will! Because it’s round. It’s like a circle except it’s oval. Like an egg. But if you keep walking in either direction, you’ll find me!”

I’m not sure it’s actually occurred to me that an oval is called an oval because it is oval shaped, like an egg. I’m also certain that the Oval in Vauxhall is also called the oval because it’s oval shaped, which it is. And I can vouch for the shape because I walked around it today.

I found myself at the cricket this morning. This wasn’t a pleasant little accident but a carefully planned excursion. Nicktor had suggested it a while ago but then not been able to book the tickets, which I did while he was in Greece. I’m very, very glad I did.

We were six: Me, Nicktor & Matt, Stuart & Joe and Sonam. Stuart is a friend of Nicktor, and Joe is his son. Sonam is a guy who works (sort of) for Syngenta in an off-shore capacity. He is from India and has been over here for six months for training. When Nicktor suggested going to cricket, he jumped at the chance…being Indian. And we’d come to see the fifth day of the fourth (and final) cricket test – England v India.

The seats were fantastic. I should clarify, they weren’t particularly comfortable (they never are) but their position was wonderful.

The Oval

And what a difference to the cricket we go up north for. Much more civilised. You get to actually watch the cricket for a start. None of the stupid fancy dress either. More about the cricket and less about showing off for your mates. Even the beer, food and toilet queues were shorter.

To top it all off, England trounced India but not before a fine morning session of batting by Tendulkar (in his final international test match) and Mishra (an excellent night watchman). It was a bit sad because Tendulkar was aiming for his 100th 100 but was out LBW for 91. The crowd, every man Jack of them, stood and applauded a fine batsman, as he left the pitch.

That is when cricket transcends all other sports; that is why it is so special and why test cricket must never disappear. It doesn’t matter who you support, the game is the thing and when a player from either side, does something special, the praise is universal.

Mishra batted very well but he went soon after the lunch break, followed by Tendulkar and then it all fell apart for India. Wickets fell as the batsmen tried to at least equal the England first innings score. They didn’t manage it and England won by an innings and 8 runs.

England fielding, the Oval

It was a very successful series for England. They beat India 4-0! I seriously think this is one of the best English test teams I’ve ever seen. They play very, very well together. I do think it’s a pity that two of the players are not actually English, however, ignoring them, the team is very solid.

Anyway, apart from that, this was Sonam’s very first test cricket match…EVER! He was like a kid in a sweet shop. He loved it (ok, he wasn’t that keen on the result but even so) and took about a thousand photographs.

All round a fabulous day, thoroughly enjoyed by all of us…well, to be completely accurate, the two boys did get a bit restless around 3:30 but it was very hot and they are very young. And they did perk up when we left.

The view from Nicktor's sunnies

And so, another yearly cricket jaunt has been completed. This year, at Headingley. A lot of beer was consumed, a day of cricket was watched and we even went to a gig! But first, the cricket.

England won the toss and elected to field

Sri Lanka started off pretty badly, although we missed the beginning because our taxi was late, the beer queue was too long and security to get into the ground was pretty full on. In fact, Neil, the nicest kindest chap you could ever hope to meet, had his umbrella confiscated at the gate. He collected it afterwards without too much hassle but, you have to wonder how this can happen in Yorkshire where it rains nearly every day, especially during cricket matches. It also makes you wonder why they took his umbrella but allowed the guys sitting behind us to get in with bottles of vodka.

So, as I said, Sri Lanka started off pretty badly, losing two early wickets to silly run outs. Actually, I’m assuming they were silly because we didn’t see them for the simple reason that…well, read the above paragraph again.

They steadily put on runs eventually making 309 for the loss of only 5 wickets. Not a bad innings and good steady run making throughout. Here’s a shot of Jayawardene just after he reached his 50 – he eventually scored 144:

During the earlier stages of the game, Sri Lanka looks confident

After the change over, England started off well but soon it fell apart with wickets falling and the bowling keeping them stuck to the crease for too long with the result that the run rate required kept mounting and the runs remained static. It started becoming obvious they wouldn’t win and the batsmen started hitting anything for runs which, of course, meant they were out a lot quicker. They could only manage a piddling 240 in reply and were all out in the 45th over (out of 50).

As a day out for a bunch of blokes, it was great. There was 12 of us in all arranged in two rows of six. This always works out well because you can float around into different seats, chatting with different people throughout the day. Unless you happen to be called Colin and do not understand the social niceties inherent in this sort of arrangement.

Nicktor gets his head in shot at Headingley

It was while we were in Holmfirth the night before that someone noticed that Paul Carrick was performing at the Picturedrome after the cricket, that we decided it would be a good idea to get tickets and go. Generally the night is just spent listlessly sitting outside Hervey’s drinking, then going to a restaurant for some food we don’t really taste because we’ve been drinking all day. Going to a gig was a welcome departure from this. It was particularly welcome because Colin didn’t manage to get tickets.

Paul Carrick has played with such bands as Mike and The Mechanics, Squeeze (or, as we called them on Australia, UK Squeeze) and Roxy Music, and has also performed solo a lot. Here he is performing for us:

Paul Carrack at the Holmfirth Picturedrome

I would estimate the average age in the audience was about 45 so you can pretty much guess the type of music he plays. Afterwards, it was agreed that this was a lovely way of spending ‘cricket night’ and we should make sure that someone is one at the Picturedrome next year when we come up. Well, someone good, anyway.

As usual we were the weekend guests of Big Al and Heidi who were wonderfully generous hosts, as usual, in their newly renovated home. The renovations are gorgeous, giving the entire house the feel of a design magazine layout. I’m not sure how much input Heidi had (I’m guessing a lot) but they now have a house they both love.

I find it amazing how friendly everyone is (if you ignore Colin, of course) when they only see me once a year. but each time they all say hi and shake my hand and remember my name. Obviously they all know each other because they work for the same company, but I’m just Nicktor’s mate. In fact, when I expressed my wonder at them all being so nice, Nicktor pointed out that they were all friends of his (excepting Colin) and therefore would be the kind of people he liked and, logically, the kind of people I liked. And vice versa. He makes an excellent point. Evidentially, I dislike Colin as much as he does as well.

A great weekend, thoroughly enjoyed by everyone. Now, here’s looking forward to 2012.

I sat at my PC last night, eager to make my blog entry about my journey home. It was about 10pm. Mirinda was fast asleep (still getting to grips with her jet lag) and the house was quiet. I typed a couple of sentences then realised I’d fallen asleep as my head hit the keyboard. I decided to go to bed.

After about ten hours sleep, I was alert and ready for the day. It was cold, the sky was very blue, it was lovely. The poodles went mad when I went downstairs – something I’ve seriously missed.

I stood at the kitchen window, waiting for the kettle and realised just how terrible the back garden looked. Mirinda had described it in a text to me as resembling the desolation of Smaug. She wasn’t wrong. It looked unloved, uncared for and unpleasant.

After discussing the plans for the day, we eventually went up to Farnham for a coffee at Cote Brasserie. The park looked grey and dull but I loved it. The day had also gone from blue to grey but this didn’t matter at all. Everywhere around us was the smell of rotting vegetation.

This is one of the smells which I remember from when we first arrived, late in February. It is strongest out in the country, wandering the lanes, across the empty fields. It is the result of vegetation rotting in waterlogged fields, of cows and horses fertilising fields, of the British countryside. I love the earthy naturalness of it. And now, it smells like home.

Walking the poodles around the park, we stood and looked out at the misty, greyness and Mirinda commented how anyone who’d seen us a week ago, bathed in sunlight and warmth, would wonder why we were glad to be home. I don’t. I love being home.

I’m just adding this photograph because I like it. Mum took it the day I left. It shows me just back from the pool.

Swimsuit Gaz

Today I saw the worst English football team EVER. I thought they were bad two games ago but today saw them sink to new depths. The Germans played well and we had a goal un-awarded that was a goal, but, whichever way you look at it, we played like one legged tap dancers in a room full of treacle.

Last night we watched two movies I’d actually not seen before.

The first was a recommendation from someone Nicktor works with. Taking Lives. It stars Angelina Jollie and Ethan Hawke with a rather odd guest spot by Kieffer Sutherland. It’s a thriller and has quite a few surprises, one of which had both of us jumping off our seats, it was so unexpected. I thought the plot was good but I had figured most of it out before the end, which is annoying. One thing that came out of it was the fact that Angelina Jollie has quite ugly wrists.

For a film about a serial killer, it is not very gory but relies more on tension and surprise, which is a nice change to what we usually watch (Saw, for instance). If you like a good thriller, and can put up with Jollie’s annoying pout and Hawke’s half hearted acting style, then I’d recommend it.

The second film was called Made. It was made by the same guys responsible for the highly successful cult movie, Swingers. It is an American gangster style film about two guys (one a bit lovelorn, the other a bit stupid) who enter the world of organised crime in order to make their mark…and earn a lot of money. Jon Favreau, who also wrote and directed it, is a lovely foil as Bobby for the stupid and irritating Rick, played by Vince Vaughn. You may remember Jon Favreau as Monica’s rich, IT boyfriend, Pete Becker, in Friends – the one she wasn’t attracted to.

A very old Peter Falk is quite funny as the LA mob boss though his voice has all but disappeared. Probably because of all those stogies that Columbo put away over the years! His final scene with Rick is particularly good.

In all, it was very funny. Most of the humour comes from the banter between the two main characters and the stupidity of Rick. If you don’t mind a fair bit of swearing (there is an awful lot) and the odd bit of violence (nothing graphic I should add), it’s a highly entertaining film.

As a bonus, and if a viewer was so inclined, there is a lot of Sopranos spotting available. It was like the Made production team strayed onto The Sopranos backlot and just employed them all. Most of the film takes place in New York so I guess that could explain a lot.

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After the movies, we watched the highlights of the first ODI between England and Australia. Without going into too much detail, England won with a stunning century from Eoin Morgan who is actually Irish. I did tease Nicktor about the English team having an Irishman and two South Africans playing for them.

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Meanwhile in Port Elizabeth, South Africa…this afternoon is England’s final chance to progress into the next round of the World Cup. To be assured of a place, they need to win against Slovenia (incidentally, the population of Slovenia is the same as the entire prison population of the US). If they only manage a draw then there’s still a chance they could get through but it will depend on the US game played at the same time. If they lose, it’s all over for another four years and Capello will probably be out of a job.

I am hoping to get home in time to see most of the game and Nicktor is going to try and rush a meeting he has in order to come over for the second half, on his way home. Mirinda has a 1:30 meeting so I should make it by 3:30…if I hurry.

I did and I managed to see all but the first ten minutes. And England played like a team possessed! They were wonderful. And they won, 1-0. Yay! We are through to the next round, albeit in second place because the Americans managed to score a late goal in their match. Nicktor managed to cut his meeting off and arrived in time to watch the second half with me.

I am not going to talk about the football except to say it’s the most dismal performance by a team of supposed international class footballers I think I’ve ever seen. I am stunned. They wouldn’t have beaten France the way they played tonight.

So, today was my induction into the Art Project at work. Though Nick worried me when I turned up and he said there was good and bad news. The bad news was that I hadn’t actually finished the Location Project because he’d found another load of records. The good news was that there were only 108 of them.

We had tea and stickies at 11am but I felt a sham. I hadn’t finished. Actually we had a jolly time just chatting, something I don’t get to do seeing as I only come in on Fridays. ‘Tea and stickies’ is lots of cakes with something wet to wash them down with.

Anyway, I’d completely finished the Location Project by lunch time. Since I started work at the museum (May 7), I have updated and entered 1,377 records. Yay.

After my usual lunch surrounded by hordes of school children eagerly screaming while stuffing food into their conveniently open mouths, I sat with Nick for the rest of the afternoon while he explained the Art Project. This is going to take some time. This project. I’m pretty sure it will not finish within my lifetime.

Essentially, I will be transferring information from a 1,000 page Word document, which represents the old database, and putting it in MIMSY, the newer database. But it’s not just a simple copy and paste. Oh no.

The information has to be disseminated throughout the proper fields and joined up with Places and People and Things. And if the information isn’t there, I have to research and enter it myself. Way cool! I’m really looking forward to starting next Friday!

I’m off to a lecture on Forensic Aspects of Ancient Egypt with Dawn tomorrow, which should be fun.

Did I say how bad the English played tonight? No, REALLY, they were awful.

So, England was going to thrash the US, eh?

We had a lovely lunch with Susanne and Rafi. Actually I think Rafi had the best time, trying to fill the water butt with gravel. I made tabbouleh and we had it with lettuce and salmon on the patio furniture. Very civilised.

So, England have a good chance of winning the World Cup, eh?

Rafi insisted we watch Monsters Vs Aliens. I loved it. What a funny film. Susan is a fantastic hero. And so nice to have a great female role model in a children’s movie. And Rafi let me watch the entire thing.

I wonder what the record is for drawn matches in the first rounds of the World Cup?

So the World Cup has finally started and we are all being deafened by those silly buzzy trumpet things. I watched a bit of the France/Uruguay match and it was like a swarm of bees. Quite annoying. In fact, Nicktor from his gout induced lounge reclining, was annoyed after 7 minutes of the South Africa/Mexico game. Not that it’ll stop me watching the England games…and any others I can manage.

Today I finished off the Location Project at the museum. It started in 2007 and has been given to just about every volunteer. And finally, it’s completed. I entered the final location at 3:30 this afternoon.

Nick (my boss) has suggested I help Rachel (the other Australian volunteer) with the Art Project. I’m not sure what that is but after the thrills and dangers of the Location Project, I can only hope I survive next week.

Something I didn’t know until this afternoon…if you need a thermometer but can’t find one, use a cricket. All you do is count the number of chirps over 25 seconds, add 13 and then divide by 3. This will give you the temperature in Celsius. I’m not sure how well a cricket can chirp from underneath a tongue, though.

I stuck a couple of England flags on the top of one of the obelisks in order to make Mirinda laugh. It worked.

England flags on an obelisk

It’s odd but I keep getting photos from my phone with what appears to be mist in them. I’ve worked out what it is. When the phone is in my pocket I tend to fiddle with it and sticking my finger in the camera hole is basically unavoidable. It’s my greasy fingers!

John Terry, allegedly, had an affair with the ex-girlfriend of Wayne Bridge, his Chelsea & England team mate. It made the front page of all the national UK papers today. And, apparently, having an extra-marital affair will hamper your ability to play football for your country. Also, there are things called super injunctions. So, if you want to keep things out of the media, you get an injunction. If you want to keep that injunction out of the media you get a super injunction. This means, you not only can’t talk about something but you can’t talk about the thing that has stopped you talking about it either.

I heard an interview on Football Focus. Three ex-footballers were asked about John Terry’s future as English captain since his affair has come to light. All three, very grave and concerned, were convinced that Capello (the England manager), known for being strict and moral, would strip him of his captain’s armband and demote him to…well, not being captain, I guess. Of course, all three spoke of it all in just emotive terms.

And then, following them, came the sports writer from the Financial Times. I much prefer his level-headed approach. Basically, he said, these are professionals. They are paid to play football and to win. When they are on the pitch, that’s what they do. They have to in order to justify their wages. Capello, too, is paid a lot of money to get England to, and maybe win, the World Cup this year. It is up to him to gauge how the team will be affected by the news story but really, Capello would have to think hard about removing one of the best players in the team.

And then Chelsea went to Burnley this afternoon and Terry showed his worth on the pitch. He scored the goal that won Chelsea the game.

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Anyway, today the sun was glorious hot, though the wind was frigidly cold. The two evened out somewhat to make a lovely day, full of blue skies. It seemed the perfect day to go to Frensham for a walk across the sandy hills and through the spiky gorse.

All was lovely and peaceful (I didn’t let the noisy trail bike riders upset me to much). The gorse that lines the path that follows the bronze age barrows on the top of the ridge has been bent over by the snow and is now growing across the path. This can be quite painful in shorts as gorse is covered in prickles, but when the temperature is just above freezing, this is not really an issue. We just brushed on through.

We passed a chap who said that ‘they’ had made a big path through the heather because of the snow. I couldn’t work out what he meant so I just nodded and smiled and said something inane so he’d think I had. He walked off smiling so I can only guess it worked. I’m pretty sure he didn’t tell me who ‘they’ were.

We have two options when we reach the top of the ridge. We can go straight back down and then around the pond or we can continue on, through the conifer woods then sweep down behind the pond. We hadn’t been round the back for ages so I voted for this. I was soon regretting it as we wound up sloshing through semi-frozen puddles of mud, half of which adhered to the puppies. Still, it was a lovely and long walk.

Mirinda & Puppies at Frensham

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Tonight we went to the Yvonne Arnaud theatre and saw the new Alan Ayckbourn play, My Wonderful Day. It’s been a while since we went to the theatre together (I went to the opera in November and Mirinda went to the ballet a couple of weeks ago) and we always try to get to Ayckbourn’s latest as it always tours to Guildford.

Well, as usual, it was excellent. Maybe I’ll give it a proper write up tomorrow. It’s late and I’m half watching Match of the Day.