The House Husband

Had my first results today. I managed a 68% in DITA (Digital Information Technologies and Architectures) which I’m pleased with. One down, three to go.

A while ago I blogged about the church ruins at the Barbican (Snow at the window) and I have managed to track down its history. It is St Alphage, London Wall.

Alphage (Alphege, Elphege) was the archbishop of Canterbury from 1005. In 1012, he refused to pay the Danegeld (the Viking ‘tax’) so the Danes had a big party, became very, very drunk, grabbed the bones of a handy oxen and beat him to death, finishing him off with an axe. Just goes to show. You really have only two certainties: death and taxes. Brave and stupid, Alphage proved it, clearly. Anyway, he was buried in St Paul’s and quickly became a national hero. In one of those typically Christian procedures, his body was dug up in 1105 to discover he wasn’t rotten. So he was made a saint. Naturally. But enough of him.

The original church was built a short time after he was killed and, because everyone loved him to the point of celebrity, it was clear it would be dedicated to him. Today a few bits of the first church remain scattered in, what could loosely be described as, a garden. At least they might be bits from the first church. I mean who really knows. They’re just stones, after all. Anyway, the church backed onto London Wall, the medieval city boundary.

This first church was dangerously close to collapse in the 16th century. During this time, the church was demanding payment for paintings and a sort of witch hunt for Anabaptists. It managed to just survive the Great Fire (1666) but by 1777, a lot of it needed rebuilding. This happened, leaving only the tower. Lots of repairs were ongoing up until 1924 when the parish was united with another and the church was not longer required.

When the parishes were united, a lot of St Alphage’s was transported to the new parish church (St Mary Aldermanbury) and, basically, just the tower remained. It managed to survive the German bombing raids in WW2, although most of the area around it was completely destroyed. Now, all that remains to tell the story, are the lower sections of three walls of the tower. A gap has been left in the Barbican and a little fence has been built around it.

Sadly, there is no information board and only a bit of searching will find any mention of it. I found most of the story in Gordon Huelin’s Vanished Churches of the City of London, a thrilling read for all the family…

Wet all day and miserable which matched the poodles who were also miserable because it meant no walk. It also matched Mirinda who is miserable, having been sick now for over a week. And it matches me because I’m gradually succumbing to a cold…well my nose is stuffed up.

I had an eye test today because my glasses fell into one of my Wellington boots when I was about to put them on. The boots, not the glasses. For some time now, they have been driving me mad. The screw in one arm keeps coming loose and falling off. It’s because I only need them for distance and have to take them off for reading (or texting or using the PC) and I’m not particularly careful about where I put them or how they land. I’ve had the screw replaced a number of times but the arm is now twisted all out of shape and the entire frame is merely balancing on the bridge of my nose, waiting for any old gust of wind to blow them off.

I was standing at the back door. I reached down for my Wellington boot. I looked down at my foot, in order to guide it into the snug fitting boot. My glasses managed to dodge my foot and nestle on the bottom. I just managed to stop my foot in time. I decided things had reached that proverbial pretty pass. I needed new glasses. Yesterday I made an appointment with Valerie and today I went.

The Optometrist is quite close to Starbuck’s which is quite close to Waitrose. There’s a gradually emerging pattern to my shopping, I fear. Anyway, I sat with Valerie as she did the usual “Read the final line” routine and we joked about people losing their glasses. I told her that if Mirinda lost hers, she could use mine but I couldn’t use hers because they are too strong. Valerie thought this was very amusing, saying that women can always use men’s things but it’s not always the same the other way.

We then chatted about work and shopping and my sick wife at home in bed. I told Valerie that I had been sent on an errand for buttons but had refused. Valerie thought this was hilarious. I told her, I’d happily bought the double-sided tape and the A4 spiral bound pad but buttons was just a step too far. Valerie sympathised and wondered where I would buy buttons in Farnham. I immediately said Elphicks.

“Oh, I know where they are, Valerie but I’m not getting them. I refuse,” I said.
“But why,” she asked, all innocent.
“Because there’s thousands of buttons in Elphicks and the chances of me picking the right ones are slim, to say the least.”

She agreed. And there is a Wall of Buttons in Elphicks. I know. Mirinda asked me to buy her a clothes brush in Elphicks and I saw it. I was frightened.

A cause for celebration! Not the soon to arrive 2010. Oh no! I finished my DITA assignment and submitted it tonight! I’m free! Well, until next week, that is.

It was a beautiful day today.  The skies were crystal clear blue and it didn’t get any hotter than 5 degrees.  All change for tomorrow though.

Mirinda still sick.  She sleeps for three hours then wakes up for an hour.  Sleeps for another three hours.  And so it goes.  Her newest symptom appears to be a headache.  And being tired.

Starbucks ran out of hazelnut syrup!  I had the last drops yesterday.  I had to make do with almond syrup today.  It’s just not the same.

I can safely say nothing of any import happened today.  I went shopping, had a coffee, went home, worked on my JavaScript for DITA, made lunch, took the dogs for a walk.  Ho hum.  Doesn’t give me a lot to blog about.  but then I read a very good article about the guy who tried to blow up the plane on Christmas Day.  And that had me thinking.

The only reason we have suicide bombers is because they think they are going somewhere after they die.  Being an atheist, I think this is stupid but it’s true, nonetheless.  Who, in their right mind, would blow themselves up if they knew they were just going to die?  And there was nothing else?  What is the point?

Now I don’t care what religion someone follows, but if they claim to be expecting to go somewhere after they die, I think they’re listening to just so much hockum.  What is wrong with THIS life?  Live it, love it, die without regrets.  I guarantee, without religion, less people would go round killing other people as readily as they do now.

But that’s the trouble with religion.  You can’t convince someone who’s been convinced by someone else that the impossible exists.  Otherwise, what do they have to look forward to?  Think about it:  a miserable life in some poor, desolate mud hut with little to eat and some guy comes and tells you about the wonderful things waiting for you after you die.  Who wouldn’t want to rush things along a bit.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!  I hate it!  Stupid, stupid humans.  I don’t see any gorilla’s worshipping the Great Pineapple.

Anyway…I’ve finished my JavaScript and uploaded it.  I am now very happy.  Not that I’ve finished my assignment but the worst is over.

If you want to read the article, it’s here.

The day started quite grey but gradually the clouds were chased away and the sun shone weakly out of a blue day.  A very chill wind blew across the higher parts of the park!

The weather reports above are more for my benefit than anyone else’s.  I decided to include one with every post.  And then Mirinda bought me a weather station for Christmas.  Once I have it erected and running, up to the minute weather will be beamed directly to my PC.  Just think how boring THAT will get!  Wind speed, wind chill, dewpoint, humidity, blah, blah, blah.  I may have to change the blog name to ‘skip the first para’.

And so today I tested the weather station.  I’m going to have to build a structure for it to sit on but I needed to test the wi-fi signal from the bottom of the garden.  It worked just fine.  Now I need a 2.4 metre post and few bits and brackets and the GazWeatherWatch can begin.

Mirinda was a lot sicker today.  Mostly because she’s sick of being sick.  This involves trying to sleep but even getting bored with that.  In fact, last night, the latest symptom was insomnia.  And dry eyes.  I was working upstairs on my DITA assignment when I realised she’d finally dropped off to sleep.  I figured I’d come downstairs and leave her to it, knowing my typing would wake her.

My day wasn’t very interesting today.  I went into town to buy dinner and spoke to Alex in Starbucks.  Her cat ate half her Christmas dinner and is now full of chicken and she didn’t get any Christmas presents because they are waiting for her in Schumania where she’s returning for a holiday in January.  And that was about it.  Not forgetting the two old ladies who asked me if Waitrose was open.

We watched most of Alice in Wonderland on channel 5 – the one with Woopi Goldberg as the Cheshire Cat.  I find it amazing that people mix and match bits from Wonderland and Looking Glass to make a single film.  It’s quite clearly a sequel.  I wonder if Tim Burton is thinking that.  Even so, it’s an enjoyable adaptation and Tina Majorino is a delightful Alice.  I do wonder why they decided to put her in a yellow pinafore.  And the striped stockings were in Looking Glass and not Wonderland.  Still.  Gene Wilder made a sorrowful Mock Turtle and Miranda Richardson was fabulous as the Queen of Hearts.  I have seen it before, of course.

And then to the park to watch as Carmen and Day-z chased a poor, frightened, ten times bigger than them, Labrador while it screamed in terror.  Oh, dear.  Naturally I apologised and told the girls they were bullies while smiling inside.  If the Lab had stopped and started chasing them, the pair of them would have run a mile and hidden, shaking and squealing.

Like yesterday, there were quite a few people roaming about and I saw a few of our neighbours taking the early evening air, shivering in the chill wind!

The poodles taking a break on a bench

I am now going to return to my DITA assignment.  I haven’t really written JavaScript for about five years!  I must concentrate!

Oh dear, Mirinda just sneezed about eight times.  I fear she may be awake again.