The final day of 2009 was grim, grey and chilly. We’re hoping for some sunshine tomorrow.

I watched the Sydney fireworks this afternoon. It’s the only thing that makes me homesick. Always brings a tear to my eye.

Anyway, this is going to be a very short entry. I have been struck down with Mirinda’s accursed bug and feel lousy. Mirinda is still not 100% so we’re off to bed well before the midnight hour. As Mirinda just said “This has to be our worst Christmas break ever!” and I couldn’t agree more. To make up for it we organised a trip to Paris for next weekend. That’ll show those lousy bugs!

Happy New Year anybody
xx

Wet all day and miserable which matched the poodles who were also miserable because it meant no walk. It also matched Mirinda who is miserable, having been sick now for over a week. And it matches me because I’m gradually succumbing to a cold…well my nose is stuffed up.

I had an eye test today because my glasses fell into one of my Wellington boots when I was about to put them on. The boots, not the glasses. For some time now, they have been driving me mad. The screw in one arm keeps coming loose and falling off. It’s because I only need them for distance and have to take them off for reading (or texting or using the PC) and I’m not particularly careful about where I put them or how they land. I’ve had the screw replaced a number of times but the arm is now twisted all out of shape and the entire frame is merely balancing on the bridge of my nose, waiting for any old gust of wind to blow them off.

I was standing at the back door. I reached down for my Wellington boot. I looked down at my foot, in order to guide it into the snug fitting boot. My glasses managed to dodge my foot and nestle on the bottom. I just managed to stop my foot in time. I decided things had reached that proverbial pretty pass. I needed new glasses. Yesterday I made an appointment with Valerie and today I went.

The Optometrist is quite close to Starbuck’s which is quite close to Waitrose. There’s a gradually emerging pattern to my shopping, I fear. Anyway, I sat with Valerie as she did the usual “Read the final line” routine and we joked about people losing their glasses. I told her that if Mirinda lost hers, she could use mine but I couldn’t use hers because they are too strong. Valerie thought this was very amusing, saying that women can always use men’s things but it’s not always the same the other way.

We then chatted about work and shopping and my sick wife at home in bed. I told Valerie that I had been sent on an errand for buttons but had refused. Valerie thought this was hilarious. I told her, I’d happily bought the double-sided tape and the A4 spiral bound pad but buttons was just a step too far. Valerie sympathised and wondered where I would buy buttons in Farnham. I immediately said Elphicks.

“Oh, I know where they are, Valerie but I’m not getting them. I refuse,” I said.
“But why,” she asked, all innocent.
“Because there’s thousands of buttons in Elphicks and the chances of me picking the right ones are slim, to say the least.”

She agreed. And there is a Wall of Buttons in Elphicks. I know. Mirinda asked me to buy her a clothes brush in Elphicks and I saw it. I was frightened.

A cause for celebration! Not the soon to arrive 2010. Oh no! I finished my DITA assignment and submitted it tonight! I’m free! Well, until next week, that is.

Rain all day. Wet, drizzly, miserable, grey-skied day. Not pleasant. Pity I haven’t put my weather station outside yet. There would have been some good readings today.

My trip into town was delayed today due to my sleeping in and having to wait for the Sainsbury’s delivery. Normally they arrive a few minutes early (ie before the hour stated) but today he was ten minutes before the end of the hour. Also he didn’t chat or smile like usual. I have to assume they are still catching up with the pre-Christmas deliveries that were seriously hampered by the snow. Anyway, he arrived and delivered; I donned raincoat and hat and, finally, I was away.

Farnham was reasonably crowded but not ridiculously so. I was only forced into the gutter a few times by mad pram drivers. It was the umbrellas that overcrowded the town today.

I hate umbrellas. I wouldn’t mind if they were only as wide as the person beneath it but oh no, people have to brandish these massive golf umbrellas like some sort of weird machismo talisman. You can tell from the smug look on their faces what they are thinking: “Ha! Look at the size of mine! Jealous lot. See how successful I am? See how much of the pavement I can claim? HA!”

Inwardly, I groan. It would almost be worth it to get poked in the eye by one just so you could sue the inconsiderate bastards. In fact, I take great malicious pleasure when a big wind comes up and blows them inside out. Sadly this doesn’t happen very often.

And why do they keep them over their heads when they are walking under things? Or standing under shelters talking to someone?

Anyway, the high street was full of mad prams and gigantic umbrellas, ruining my day. OK, not really ruining my day. I don’t let that sort of thing get to me. Oh no, there’s far more important things. Like Starbuck’s running out of hazelnut syrup!

Well, I can happily report, that that particular dilemma has been resolved. Today they had a new batch and almond was not forced down my throat. All my Starbuck’s chums were working today. Beccy, Alex, young American guy, big smiley guy who looks a bit like Nigel, elf girl. It was nice to be greeted by so many people I only know through my choice of coffee. And none of them know my name. Totally weird.

I mean how do you get to the point where they do know your name? I’ve often wondered. Does it happen because you have mutual friends? Or because someone yells out to you across the place and use your name? Or when you accidentally forget to take your name tag off? This happened to me when I worked in Woking. I always had the same coffee at the same time at the same coffee place every day. They started calling me Gary at some point and it took me ages to realise it was because I was always wearing my ID around my neck.

Having had my coffee, it was into Waitrose and a post-shop chat with one of the check-out ladies. The topic today was the excess of Christmas food. It’s amazing how much of a conversation you can fit into £12 of supermarket transaction.

She dined at her son’s place this year and there was a LOT of food. Then he was coming to her on the day after Boxing day but he didn’t turn up. So she had a whole load of food left over to go along with the food she’d been given from his place. While I sympathised with the amount of turkey I’m still eating (I actually finished the last of it for lunch today) she said that wasn’t the problem.

“Oh no,” she said, “It’s the cheese. There’s always too much cheese.”

It seems she had gone mad buying cheese and had lots left over which she and her husband have been slowly nibbling through. I explained that I had done the same thing. I bought a whole load of cheese for Christmas and it didn’t get eaten (we sat and ate most of it yesterday).

“Trouble is,” she continued, “My husband’s doctor has said he has to cut down on cheese, not eat more of it! Which means I’ve got to eat it all!”

I thought about this on the way home. I should say, I thought about lots of things. I wouldn’t want anyone to think I spent the entire 15 minute walk focussed on cheese. And I thought about (see?) the awful waste that Christmas represents. Not just in quantities of cheese but in wrapping paper, cards, uneaten food, ruined presents, unwanted presents, etc, etc. Is that what makes us civilised? The fact that we can buy, not use and discard if we want? See? Sometimes I get quite serious during my walk home.

Latest news on my DITA assignment is that I should finish sometime tomorrow! Hip, hip hooray!

It was a beautiful day today.  The skies were crystal clear blue and it didn’t get any hotter than 5 degrees.  All change for tomorrow though.

Mirinda still sick.  She sleeps for three hours then wakes up for an hour.  Sleeps for another three hours.  And so it goes.  Her newest symptom appears to be a headache.  And being tired.

Starbucks ran out of hazelnut syrup!  I had the last drops yesterday.  I had to make do with almond syrup today.  It’s just not the same.

I can safely say nothing of any import happened today.  I went shopping, had a coffee, went home, worked on my JavaScript for DITA, made lunch, took the dogs for a walk.  Ho hum.  Doesn’t give me a lot to blog about.  but then I read a very good article about the guy who tried to blow up the plane on Christmas Day.  And that had me thinking.

The only reason we have suicide bombers is because they think they are going somewhere after they die.  Being an atheist, I think this is stupid but it’s true, nonetheless.  Who, in their right mind, would blow themselves up if they knew they were just going to die?  And there was nothing else?  What is the point?

Now I don’t care what religion someone follows, but if they claim to be expecting to go somewhere after they die, I think they’re listening to just so much hockum.  What is wrong with THIS life?  Live it, love it, die without regrets.  I guarantee, without religion, less people would go round killing other people as readily as they do now.

But that’s the trouble with religion.  You can’t convince someone who’s been convinced by someone else that the impossible exists.  Otherwise, what do they have to look forward to?  Think about it:  a miserable life in some poor, desolate mud hut with little to eat and some guy comes and tells you about the wonderful things waiting for you after you die.  Who wouldn’t want to rush things along a bit.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!  I hate it!  Stupid, stupid humans.  I don’t see any gorilla’s worshipping the Great Pineapple.

Anyway…I’ve finished my JavaScript and uploaded it.  I am now very happy.  Not that I’ve finished my assignment but the worst is over.

If you want to read the article, it’s here.

The day started quite grey but gradually the clouds were chased away and the sun shone weakly out of a blue day.  A very chill wind blew across the higher parts of the park!

The weather reports above are more for my benefit than anyone else’s.  I decided to include one with every post.  And then Mirinda bought me a weather station for Christmas.  Once I have it erected and running, up to the minute weather will be beamed directly to my PC.  Just think how boring THAT will get!  Wind speed, wind chill, dewpoint, humidity, blah, blah, blah.  I may have to change the blog name to ‘skip the first para’.

And so today I tested the weather station.  I’m going to have build a structure for it to sit on but I needed to test the wi-fi signal from the bottom of the garden.  It worked just fine.  Now I need a 2.4 metre post and few bits and brackets and the GazWeatherWatch can begin.

Mirinda was a lot sicker today.  Mostly because she’s sick of being sick.  This involves trying to sleep but even getting bored with that.  In fact, last night, the latest symptom was insomnia.  And dry eyes.  I was working upstairs on my DITA assignment when I realised she’d finally dropped off to sleep.  I figured I’d come downstairs and leave her to it, knowing my typing would wake her.

My day wasn’t very interesting today.  I went into town to buy dinner and spoke to Alex in Starbucks.  Her cat ate half her Christmas dinner and is now full of chicken and she didn’t get any Christmas presents because they are waiting for her in Schumania where she’s returning for a holiday in January.  And that was about it.  Not forgetting the two old ladies who asked me if Waitrose was open.

We watched most of Alice in Wonderland on channel 5 – the one with Woopi Goldberg as the Cheshire Cat.  I find it amazing that people mix and match bits from Wonderland and Looking Glass to make a single film.  It’s quite clearly a sequel.  I wonder if Tim Burton is thinking that.  Even so, it’s an enjoyable adaptation and Tina Majorino is a delightful Alice.  I do wonder why they decided to put her in a yellow pinafore.  And the striped stockings were in Looking Glass and not Wonderland.  Still.  Gene Wilder made a sorrowful Mock Turtle and Miranda Richardson was fabulous as the Queen of Hearts.  I have seen it before, of course.

And then to the park to watch as Carmen and Day-z chased a poor, frightened, ten times bigger than them, labrador while it screamed in terror.  Oh, dear.  Naturally I apologised and told the girls they were bullies while smiling inside.  If the lab had stopped and started chasing them, the pair of them would have run a mile and hidden, shaking and squealing.

Like yesterday, there were quite a few people roaming about and I saw a few of our neighbours taking the early evening air, shivering in the chill wind!

The poodles taking a break on a bench

I am now going to return to my DITA assignment.  I haven’t really written JavaScript for about five years!  I must concentrate!

Oh dear, Mirinda just sneezed about eight times.  I fear she may be awake again.

Weather-wise, it was a day of all sorts.  Blue skies, grey clouds, sun showers, mud.  Decidedly not cold and the snow has all melted.

The poodles were a bit over excited, growling and snarling over various bits of dead turkey and brightly coloured squeaky toys.  They find Christmas all a bit too much.  Sick of hiding their various presents around the house, I took them for a walk.  Just as the rain started.  Of course, having already attached the lead it was too late to back out so I threw on my raincoat and ventured forth into the park.

There was an extraordinary number of people wandering around the park.  Big family groups, not always with dogs, clearly exercising off Christmas dinner.  These are people who are not normally in the park.  They don’t bother saying hello like the regular dog walkers.  I generally refer to them as city types.  I have no idea if they are.  For all I know, they may be from South Farnham – the snotty part.

Most of the shops in Farnham were closed so maybe these people were lost, searching for an open  store.  I say most but the ones that were open were not the big chains (except for Boots and Smiths) but smaller ones and some restaurants.

One big group was walking with a feisty little Jack Russell.  It was when we were almost home so the poodles were back on their lead.  As usual they decided to snap and snarl at the Jack Russell but, unusually, the other dog snapped and snarled back.  Generally dogs run off when Day-z snaps at them.  She really has absolutely no social skills.  But not this time.

The Jack Russell chased them around my legs, entangling me in the lead.  Carmen started squealing (she is so embarrassing) and slipped her collar off.  The Jack Russell managed to pin her to the ground and was baring its teeth.  Carmen was squealing even louder.  I managed to separate them and calm Carmen down while the Jack Russell’s owner finally ambled over to put his dog on his lead.

He was all cheerful and chuckles as he bent over and scratched Day-z’s face.  I did the right thing and assuaged their fears by saying Carmen was a drama queen.  Did they apologise?  Did they say anything.  Actually, yes.  He asked me how to get back to the cricket ground carpark.  I was very tempted to direct them into the worst, muddiest part of the park but I resisted and told them the shortest way.  Just as it started to rain.

No harm was done.  Carmen really is a drama queen – from her sick bed, Mirinda heard her screams they were so loud – but I really thought these people could have expressed a bit of remorse.  Like I say, city types.  They just have no idea of the rules.

Contrary to this, at the beginning of the walk, we were met by a terrier called Elvis.  We’ve seen him before and he was truly ready to play.  He ran up to Carmen, making her chase him.  When she turned back he’d come up behind her and pat her on the back, making her chase him again.  He was hilarious.  Day-z didn’t think so as she stuck to my side but Carmen was having a great time.  As was Elvis.

Walking with Elvis were three humans who made all sorts of apologetic noises, through the laughter.  It really wasn’t necessary but Elvis HAD started it.  It was far too funny to take too seriously.

Oh, and Mirinda is still sick.  She seems to gain a new symptom each day.  This morning she was sneezing.  She’s getting pretty bored.  She wanders around upstairs like Mrs Rochester in the attic!

The day brightened up beautifully.  We started with grey clouds and what looked like becoming a grim old Christmas day but then, out of the blue, came the…err…blue.  The rest of the day was glorious though still cold.

I’m starting to get a bit annoyed with the amount of things that religion has appropriated.  All this talk about Jesus being born on Christmas day.  Ok, clearly, Christmas is the birth of Christ but it didn’t happen on 25 December.  Well, it may have but the thing is, no-one actually knows.

Before the Christians decided to steal Christmas for themselves, it was a celebration of the winter solstice.  It was to mark the end of the shortest days and a look forward to the days growing longer.

Of course, we all know this is 21 December but the Romans did the maths wrong.  They didn’t realise it, but gradually, over a few hundred years, 21 December drifted four days ahead in time and, voila, solstice becomes Christmas.   Not that the Romans did it first.  They appropriated the calendar, changing it slightly, from the Egyptians.

Anyway, another one has gone by and another Christmas dinner has been created, eaten and (almost) cleaned up after.  I was up at 6am and worked steadily towards lunch at 2pm.

I was very happy with the turkey this year.  The meat just slid off and was soft to taste.  I was also happy with my cranberry sauce.  I generally find it too tart but it was somehow slightly sweeter this year.  Karen particularly liked my parsnips and Nigel enthused over my shortbread.  Mirinda loved everything, exactly the way a wife should.

Karen and Nigel are at the airport at the moment, waiting for their flight which leaves in less than an hour.  Karen is clutching two turkey and cranberry rolls because she doesn’t believe that BA Business Class food is any good.  It’s funny to think that by the time I get to sleep, they’ll be in the sky, flying home.

me at the cooker preparing lunch

The weather is getting warmer and the snow is now ice and slush.  Late in the day, ghostly clouds of frozen fog can be seen rising from the sports fields at the top of the park.  Eerie.

Hopefully I’ve managed to finish the Christmas shopping today as it’s now 5pm on Christmas eve.  Not much hope of getting anything beyond maybe some forecourt flowers at the BP garage on the bypass.

Spent most of the day cooking and cleaning and getting prepared for tomorrow; the usual Christmas palaver that I love.  Oddly, there are no presents for Karen & Nigel but given they are flying back to Australia tomorrow night and they’ve managed to rid themselves of virtually all their belongings in one way or another, it seemed a bit pointless.  Karen said Christmas dinner would be present enough.  And the turkey and cranberry sauce roll she’s ordered for eating on the plane.

Anyway, that’s tomorrow.  This afternoon, something very odd happened.  I took the puppies for a walk in the park.  No, that’s not the odd thing!  We walked along the playing fields then turned to walk along the Queen’s Bottom.  This is the very bottom of a big field which is actually called White’s Bottom.  It is bordered at the top by the Queen’s Hedge.  So, naturally, I call it the Queen’s Bottom.

The very bottom is the result of glacial melt following an ice age.  It’s part of the terracing that is evident all around Farnham.  Each level from different epochs.  Mostly the terracing ends in the River Wey but in the park, it is generally dry and full of alluvial deposits (that’s mixed gravel, basically).  During the Mesolithic, it would have been a wide river where our ancestors fished and swam and generally had fun in the summer months.  I know this because there’s quite a few Mesolithic camps dotted around the area.

The only reason I’ve bothered explaining all that (and I apologise if you’ve nodded off or wandered over to a more interesting blog about The Used Stamps of Sweden) is because it is now flowing again with the meltwater from the recent heavy snowfall.  It’s almost a glimpse into the far distant past, and quite exciting.  However, that’s not really why I’m telling you but it did get me quite excited.

As we wandered down towards the Queen’s Bottom, Carmen suddenly went mad.  She sometimes gets very excited and runs around like a lunatic and I figured this is what she was doing.  She started running in circles and rolling in the remains of the snow (more odd behaviour she’s suddenly developed) then took off at full pelt towards the quick flowing stream at the bottom.  Without slowing she ran into then along it for quite a distance before turning back towards Day-z and me, where she threw herself down into the snow and started rubbing herself in it.  She then repeated this over and over and over again.

Generally when one of the puppies goes for a run, the other isn’t far behind (they hate being left out) but this time, Day-z didn’t move away from me at all.  She was watching Carmen with that wary suspicion she excels at.   It was truly bizarre.  Once we reached the Avenue of Trees which is at the top of the Queen’s Bottom field, Carmen had stopped her lunatic running and rolling and was back to normal.

Something else I should mention.  A bit earlier, Mirinda had told me Carmen had vomited upstairs.  It was bright yellow and didn’t look right.  It seems to me that Carmen had eaten something yellow and it had disagreed with her.  Judging by the fluorescent colour, I understand completely.

Now, what I’m wondering is, are the two things related at all?  Did she find something that sent her on some sort of drug-induced trip?  Was she hallucinating that the stream made her hot so she had to cool off in the snow which made her cold so she had to warm up in the stream and around and around?

She seems to be fine now, lying on her armchair, pretending to be asleep.  It will probably remain a mystery.

The weather today ranged from blue skies to grey clouds to sleet to…I think it’s raining now but not sure.  I guess there’ll be no snow for Christmas then.

Well, never let it be said I don’t know what I’m good at.  Forget the stupid stollen!  Today, among other things, I made batches of shortbread and mince pies (all my own work…with a little help from Delia) and they were pronounced as perfect.  A pity I forgot the Christmas cake but these will have to do.

I also bought the turkey today.  Normally I leave it till the last minute and buy it Chrissy eve but today at Waitrose, there were fights breaking out for the final birds so I ducked underneath the flailing arms and grabbed the closest to hand.  It’s enough to feed 8-10 people, apparently.  It’s presently filling the fridge.

I’ve had a rather busy day, all round, and am looking forward to bed.  I just finished watching Spooks (the last in the present series and my favourite show) and they did it again!  A big bomb, an agent in jeopardy, possibly dead, no way out…and no answers till the next series!  AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

So, a short entry for a change.

Lovely blue skies over snow white land and quite chilly.  Paths slippery!

Today we were due to journey into London (Mirinda being off work over Christmas) to meet Karen and Nigel to see the new wing at the V&A.  Last night, Mirinda started coughing and hacking and generally sounding ill which could have had something to do with the lack of buttons on her coat and getting covered in sleet and snow.  All that added up to me going into London and leaving my sad and sorry wife snuggled up in bed as I ventured forth into the freeze.

I had watched a feature on the new gallery on The Culture Show a few weeks ago and was really keen to see it.  When I mentioned it to Karen, she suggested we all meet and see it.  A sort of final day out I guess.  It is fantastic.  For someone like me who is into just about everything but particularly religious iconography, mythical sculpture and St Sebastien, it was pretty much close to heaven.  As we strolled through the rooms, I mentioned to Nigel that it was exactly like any of our tours of Europe – me and churches!

Karen, it seems, does not like religious iconography, finds it unpleasant to look at.  I told her it was because she didn’t know how to read them; didn’t know the stories behind the images.  I described a few of them to her but she remains unconvinced.  I, however, loved every minute.  Well, except for the carpets.  I really cannot get particularly excited about carpets.

The were two Saint Sebastiens though!  One glorious little statue in silver and gilt by Hans Holbien the Elder.  Here’s a picture of it.

San Sebastien

The fine detail is wonderful.  It only stands about 300mm high.  It is exquisite.  It was my favourite piece in the whole gallery.

In saying that, there were a couple of honourable mentions for best in gallery.  The first goes to the oddly named Bartmann Jugs.  I thought the name was a joke and had something to do with The Simpsons but no, these things came first.  They were vessels which depicted bearded men, looking quite serious.  The head was generally at the top, beneath the neck of the jug, and the body of the jug was the man’s body.  They were generally of quite generous proportions!  Clearly very well fed with the contents of the jug.  They seriously looked quite odd.  I’ll post them on the site later along with the other V&A photos I took.  I have and they’re here.

The other honourable mention and equally odd, was a carved tufa fireplace decoration.  It showed hunting scenes and had lots of animals and people doing all sorts of hunting things.  Nothing unusual there at all.  Until you looked really closely.  One of the men had the bottom of his trousers ripped off and was showing his pants which, on close inspection, appeared to be a pair of frilly French knickers!  I kid you not.  It was made between 1510 & 1530 in Padua, Italy.

We spent quite a long time in the gallery so it’s possibly a good thing Mirinda stayed in bed!  About half way through Karen popped off to see another exhibit while Nigel and I finished.  It was then off for lunch.

When I used to visit Karen at work and we’d go for lunch, we had taken to visiting a nice little French place, not far from the V&A.  It served vast quantities of salmon and scrambled eggs and the staff were always pleasant.  We decided this would do for lunch.  Imagine our surprise when we discovered it had changed into an Italian place with a window full of cakes.

According to the manager, it was originally the Italian place then changed to French and has now returned to what it should be.  They now have pizza.  I was once more in heaven.

Karen told us a funny story as we ate.  They, naturally, have been extremely busy packing up, cleaning, selling and generally dispersing their worldly goods to all manner of places, in preparation for their return to Australia.  One box of stuff was destined for a charity shop and was safely situated in a cupboard, waiting for it’s trip downstairs.  On Sunday, Karen and Nigel came over, bringing with them their last bits and pieces, wine for Christmas day and Christmas presents.  I didn’t put the presents under the tree as Carmen was a little too interested in them.  Apparently, there are no present for me in the bag.  They were taken to the charity shop by accident and distributed to the ends of Wimbledon.  Because Karen always buys me odd things from odd places around the world, she couldn’t possibly re-buy them.  They are likely to be quite rude so I’m a tad concerned about some frail old volunteer opening the box and getting a fright

It was sort of a sad day, really.  Though we’ll see them on Christmas day, I realised today how much I’m going to miss Karen.  Still, she’ll only ever be an email away!